Tuesday, 13 January 2015

Goodbye 2014 | Lifestyle

(Image sourced from WeHeartIt)

I know it's a few weeks too late to write a 'goodbye 2014' post however, it's been a little bit hectic for me over the last couple of months. 

2014 saw me come into my own being a mum, and that was extremely hard work. We saw Dexter's first birthday and how amazing and wonderful he has grown. He's grown into such a little man so quickly that none of us could have imagined how he would have developed. He's taking his first couple of steps now, and being extremely vocal without saying words. He loves having a full blown conversation with you and is always full of smiles and hugs. It was interesting to go China and see how children are brought up over there, I'd say difficult more than interesting to be honest. Children at one year old were expressionless, and just toddling around without taking interest in anything. I was constantly being judged every time I did anything with Dexter, and for him to sleep in a cot rather than in a bed with me was just completely unheard of. I'm proud of the mum I've become and how well I'm raising Dexter. 

It's been a terrible year for me health-wise too. After giving birth (I'm not sure if I can call a caesarean 'birth' but what the hey) my health too a down turn. I have ME, and have done since a young age (17) but have learnt to control it and deal with it. This year has been horrid, I had a nasty relapse and have had it pretty hard. Illnesses and infections have hit me at speed and it's taken me over a year to probably clear any of these up. Added to this was the fact I ended up in hospital in August with sciatica, that's bad enough, but then finding out I've had a dislodged pelvis since having Dexter really didn't make me happy. I don't think I've ever been in so much pain in my life actually, that was pretty traumatic! It's taken me several months to get better from that, and overall it will take months of rehabilitation and therapy to build up my muscles again. Amongst all this I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and started receiving CBT therapy for my anxiety and severe depression. It's been a long year and I haven't been able to wait for the end of the year. A couple of months back I found out I was vitamin D deficient too which hasn't helped my ME and certainly hasn't helped my bones and joint pain. Le sigh. I'm starting 2015 with numerous hospital and specialist appointments for other ongoing issues stemming from the rubbish year, so hopefully (fingers crossed) things will look up from there. 

Finally, a couple of weeks ago I lost my grandmother. She'd had a long battle with illness and spent most of her last years in pain and on dialysis. She had a fall at home resulting in a stay in a nursing home as we couldn't provide the care for her anymore. More so my mum wasn't able to care for her, me and looking after Dexter when I was unwell. Unfortunately she had a fall or something (it's still under investigation) in the home which resulted in her having a broken hip. Following a long-term hospital admittance and numerous set backs she decided she wanted to end her life by ending her dialysis. We were lucky that she died the same night without being in pain following the end of her dialysis, she got her wish finally. 

Things have been tough, a lot tougher than I care to let on in this blog post, but looking at Dexter makes me realise that everything will be ok. Here's to 2015 and hopefully this brings us a new journey in our lives. 

4 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry you have had such a rough 2014. I sincerely hope 2015 is a billion times better for you and Dexter. If you ever need to chat, I'm just a click away. Lisa x

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  2. You're so strong, lovely. I'm so sorry about your Grandmother. 2015 will be your year! <3
    Keep fighting!
    Xx

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    1. Thanks lovely, it's been a touch one but we're getting there :D x

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